5 Gym Habits That Drive Me Crazy

21 04 2011

1. Occupying machines and not using them
Okay so i understand that people do need to bring their cellphones in the gym, I also understand that people get calls and need to answer them. But if you’re talking about what you’re having for breakfast please get the fuck up and walk to the wall. you’re clearly not going to use the machine any time soon, how much is it going to take for you to walk to the wall and get out of the way. Especially if you see someone standing there… Come on

2. Screaming to the top of your lungs while you lift
Unfortunately for this one there is no median. you’re either big(muscular) and drawing attention to yourself or you’re really frail and you’re having a hard time. Either way cut that shit out. Nobody wants to hear you moan while you work out. We’re excited that you can bench 420. *One hand clap* Not only is it distracting it makes you look like a douchebag.

3. throwing down weights as hard as u can when you’re finished
This goes directly back to the last one. Same situation but this one is particular stupid and dangerous. It would surprise you by how many times I’ve come into the gym and they’ve had broken glass no doubt due to some jack ass hurling his weights at the window when he/she was finished.

4. Not thoroughly wiping down sweat from machines
This is something that you think that you wouldnt have to deal with… But you do sadly. People will get on a machine or on a station and sweat all over it and then just get up or casually take a light wipe with their towel on the machine. No! That didn’t do a damn thing. Wipe it down as if you, yourself were preparing to use it next.

5. The people watching
Okay I understand the gym being a social place, thats fine, but usually its unwanted attention. This is the reason women come to the gyms with their boyfriends and all the single guys(like me) are pissed off. Also its like a mini gay club. I like the compression stuff when i workout and it seem to be a gay magnet. Not just gay dudes but old gay guys…. Lets keep it to working out please… Please.

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Location:Milda Dr,Houston,United States


5 Reasons There Will Never Be Another Iverson

21 04 2011

1. His Image

When AI came into the NBA near the end of the Jordan era, the NBA still had a clean cut star lead them through every period. Before Jordan it was Bird and Magic(he gained his fame before the AIDS scandal) Though Jordan had many other demons that if he were around through the age of TMZ we would probably know about. Then came the 6 foot cornrowed having tattooed star Allen Iverson. Even before he took a shot he encompassed the underprivileged black kid, any person who had ever picked up a ball in the hood, anyone who had ever been told that they couldn’t do something. He stood tall in the land of giants, shot over everyone and dominated. Just as punk rock was a direct backlash from the disco era, AI seemed almost the anti Jordan.

2. The Crossover

Yes we all remember him crossing up Jordan, and no he didn’t create it, but he sure did make it his own. While many players like Wade, Rose, and Paul use it today, the speed and velocity that AI did it with set him apart. Being listed at 6 feet tall(and probably being 5 foot 10) this was AI’s major move that he had to use to free himself up for a trip to the rim.

3. He took one of the worst teams ever to the Finals and had a memorable Game 1
Aaron Mckie, Jerome James, Eric Snow, Mcollough, reading these back to back makes u think of plumbers or contractors… No these were a few members of Iverson’s “supporting cast”. Yes he did have a slightly past his prime Dikembe Mutumobo, but at that point he was only good for defense. Not only did he take this team to the finals but he delivered a game 1 performance for the ages. Who will ever forget him making a contested jumper then “stepping over Tyronn Lue”?

4. His Fall From Grace
As much as it pains me to say this I’ve never seen one player plummet so far. From all star to punchline for jokes. His refusal to accept his limitations led to his demise. He got the reputation as a cancer and it eventually shoved him out of the league he fought so hard to get to. If anything he is a lesson in what not to do when your skills begin to diminish. He never really was great at passing the ball or had a consistent jumper so when those went he should have changed or tweaked his game like all the greats do. Being traded to Detroit was one thing, but being cut by Memphis and then a weird return to Philly were even more disconcerting.

5. Pratice
practice? We talking bout Pratice? Not a game… Not a game.. practice
What basketball sound byte has been played more than this? The answer is nothing…
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Top Five Things You Say You’ll Never Do(But end up doing anyway)

21 04 2011

1. Becoming your parents
Yes sadly it happens. Our parents hate the fads of our day, we tell them its not a fad and say that we’ll treat our kids better and let them do what they want. Then we get older and realize perhaps they weren’t being asses after all. Unknowingly we pick up their sayings and mannerisms that we used to hate.

2. Really unhip

For some of us this happens way quicker then it does for others. When we’re young it consumes us that we have the fashion of the day so that we wont be ridiculed and we’ll fit in. Then we get older and become more independent and stop giving a damn. We even go as far to make fun of the fads of today.

3. Becoming religious

Now this isn’t so much a bad thing, as it is more of a social thing. When were young we skip church as much as we can…. Or at least I know thats what I did. Church time was time that could be spent sleeping or playing video games. When you’re older, there is no more club, there is only the church. Think about it. You wear your best clothes, best cologne/perfume, and make sure you pick a spot where you can be seen. Depending on what church you go to its somewhat of a musical concert! Its the club!

4. A sucker for love

As a man, its championed that you’re a player or pimp and have as many women as possible with as little attachment or commitment as possible. Commitment is seen as a preverbal jail. But at least once in our lives we end up falling for somebody and they have all the cards. Its inevitable! We act like we have complete control over our hearts but truthfully we don’t.

5. A Sellout

We all love to champion our morals and say that we hold strong to them but given the opportunity how much will buy us? For example I hate Tyler Perry movies. I hate them with all of my soul. If God said to me Julian I kill 1000 kittens but Tyler Perry never gets to make another film those kittens would be slaughtered! But all that aside if he said heres 250k to have a role in one of my movies i would do it!!! This goes for a lot of other situations to. Having morals is nice but having money is nicer.

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The Return of Ju

21 04 2011

Its been a while blog world. Sorry I’ve been away so long. The more i tried to blog the more things got in the way. I herby swear to blog at least weekly again. I promise to bring u more awful lists and bullshit you don’t care about lol… Pinky swear!

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Location:Milda Dr,Houston,United States

Top Ten Things I’ve Learned the Hard Way

21 09 2010

1. Not situation in life should be a dead end.
We all want to make things work some times. We want to dig in and make the best of our sitatuiion. However, sometimes that situation can be changed. When i was in my hometown I thought it would be on the only place that I might ever call home. But, when you have so many downfalls and failures in one place, it can sometimes become the pit of your despair. Your job at this time is not to play the cards you were dealt, but to do everything in your power to change your cards….. Yes I stole that from Kanye.

2. Don’t try to force love. If it isn’t there it isn’t there.
Yes I think my situation has been well documented so I wont get into it.( Let’s save that one for a drunk night) Yes its painful and it hurts but if you’ve tried everything you could to get that person to feel the same way about you the best thing to do is to pack up and call it a day. Dragging things out will not make things easier. In fact, it will make things extremely difficult. I know this is much easier to say then to do, but I beg you look for the signs and don’t leave your heart out their on a line hoping they’ll one day bite.

3. Women who want to get married at hello are bad news.
This is the conundrum that men find themselves in constantly. We love fast women but we don’t take them seriously. We are impatient with slow women, but we end up wanting them the most. Now of course their are two kinds of fast women, women who are quick to jump in bed with you and women who are quick to say they love you. NEITHER ARE GOOD FOR YOU. Trust me I’ve had my share of both and they seem to belong in the mental hospital more then they belong in your company. Women who want to get married at hello tend to want to love to hard. They over compensate because of past experiences, they fight you viscously at every turn, and then want to make up only to repeat the same steps the next day. They tend to be beautiful and sweet at first. But then the “beast” comes out in them. If you cant wait I can understand… But if you can please avoid those women.

4. Lying and cheating does find its way back to you
Now for all of the wining and crying I’ve done about how I was so loving to all my women, Im going to be honest with you. I’ve never been anywhere close to being a saint. I can say that their have been very few times where I cheated. But lots of times where I came close or toted the line. However innocent you think a text here or a little kiss there may be it usually comes back tenfold. Im not trying to be fire and brimstone but it does. You mess around and you’ll be left holding on to what was instead of what is.

5. Idolize no one. Heroes are for children.
Yes it may seem harsh, but idolizing people always ends up with hard feelings. The truth is these people are human just like we are. But we see them performing what we deem to be superhero feats and we forget that they are flesh and blood just like us. Its happened to me twice in my life, once with my father(to long to get into) and to a much lesser extent with Michael Jordan. I’ll explain the Jordan example. Most of us loved MJ growing up, one of the best players ever if not the best. He could seem to do nothing wrong for so long during his career. Even a book that exposed some of his badder habits(“Jordan Rules”) couldn’t deter his fans. However, today a bitter older and more documented Jordan has come off as a complete asshole. Nothing like the man we all thought he was.

6. Never let anyone dictate who you are friends with or what you believe in.
This one is pretty much self explanatory. Just because someone else is homophobic or a bigot doesn’t mean that you have to be one. You aren’t who you hang with. You are you.

7. No matter how bad you want to call your ex, don’t do it!
We’ve all been here right? We all think we may be adult enough to let the past be the past. We all think that we can just be reasonable human beings and accept the fact that whats over is over. But the rough truth is most of us cant. Calling that ex is like pulling off a bandage on a wound that isn’t healed yet. Take your time, take all the time you need. But please don’t rush back to your ex and revisit things with these romanticized notions. There was a reason you and her broke up…

8. Friends come and go. Its life
In high school, we all usually belong to that clique or group of friends that we think will never end. But college comes and poof that usually goes out of the window. We all have different wants and needs. We fall out with each other because we cant accept those changes. Very few of us remain the same.Don’t stress over it, a new crop usually comes sooner than later.

9. If you have a good family and a good relationship with God you are never alone.
We all have those moments where we feel like nobody understands us and our problems. We close ourselves off to our friends and family thinking that they can’t relate. We feel alone. But truthfully we’re not. Its at the time when you’re lowest when you should return to your roots. Yes we don’t all have great home lives. But we usually have one person that we trust to confide our problems in. If all of that fails, there is always the Man upstairs. I’m not a fan in confiding in a priests or minister. But God always listens and has the best solutions. He may not answer right away but he always answers.

10.Nice is great but it wont get you respect
Nice guys finish last right? Right. Theres nothing wrong with being kind. In fact it makes life really feel worthwhile sometimes. But unfortunately people see that as weakness. They see smiles and bending over backwards as an opportunity to get over on you. I’m not saying don’t be nice. Im just saying don’t ever be a doormat. Stand up for yourself every opportunity you get.

Overrated Comedians

25 07 2010

I must admit that I know that most will disagree with this list because comedic taste can vary for an abundant number of reasons. Whether it be your income, race, sexual preference, level of prudicity(yes i made this word up) they can all factor into what you find funny. I love comedy for the most part. However, their are a few comedians who don’t really make me chuckle. This list is for the comedians that I think are grossly overrated.

3. Katt Williams
Now I have to preface this by saying that I have watched one of his comedy shows and it was decent, but for the love and admiration this guy gets he’s overrated. His pimp schtick has gotten quite old. We get it. You’re a small guy who played a pimp on a movie. Its not really that exciting or funny to hear a guy tell short jokes for an hour and a half. It seems that every black comedian tells church, ghetto, and women jokes. Please bring something else to the table other than your annoying high pitched voice, Pimpin!

2. Carlos Mencia
This guy is on every comedians lame list. He’s had spats with Joe Rogan(yes the UFC guy) and George Lopez. Lopez claims that he stole some of his old material. I don’t doubt it. The guy seems like a talentless hack. He constantly throws around the word “beaner” but according to his birth certificate he’s not Hispanic. So far we have an offensive, joke stealing, racist, talentless hack… Need I say more? Here’s hoping his Comedy Central show stays canceled, and if its not already canceled then please do it ASAP!

1. Dane Cook
Good lord this man is not funny! Okay I’ll give up the fact that he is an attractive guy. Yep i said it. No need for the obligatory “no homo” statement, because unlike alot of men in my age group I don’t give a shit what they think of me. Anyway. The guy literally leaps around on the stage, makes awful noises and gets thunderous laughs! He’s #1 because he fills up stadiums! His movies aren’t any better. Employee of the month boasted a showstopping co-star headlining of Dane Cook and Jessica Simpson!!!! The other Academy Award nominees had no shot.

Top 5 Guilty Pleasure Songs

19 07 2010

Let’s be honest! We all have songs that we listen to when we think we’re all alone or we’re in our cars with the windows rolled all the way up!! We don’t want our friends or even strangers on the street to know we like these songs but we do! Its one of those things that makes music great! We know we’re not supposed to like it but we cant help ourselves! Here’s my Top 5

5. Stand Up Guy T.I.
Before you say what!? Let me explain. I’m a huge T.I. fan. I’ve been a fan since day 1. I can actually say as a true fan this is one of his worst songs. It’s annoying and the chorus is literally laughable. But I love this song! Why!? I don’t know! It somewhat saddens me! But anytime the song comes on I feel myself loving it.

4. Maroon 5 Harder to Breathe
I was initially going to put their biggest hit to date “This Love” up here but I decided not to because that was truly to good to be embarrassed about. This song however is hardcore and unforgiving but it still has that feel of okay this is clearly pop and its the same group that sings that song She Will Be Loved!! All the windows rolled up on this please!

3. N’SYNC Gone
Okay this may be sort of a copout because it is the least boy banish song that I’ve ever heard from Justin Timberlake when he used to have lackeys with him. It’s got quite alot of soul in it. But it’s still NSYNC!

2.Coldplay Viva La Vida
I am a closet Coldplay fan. I like the group a lot but unfortunately as successful as they are they are critics’ favorite punching bag. They wine a lot about not being taken seriously and don’t really consider themselves pop when they truly are. That being said this song kicks ass. Its just not something I would play in front of my friends….or my family…… or strangers.

1. Color Me Bad I Adore Mi Amor
I truly feel a little sick to my stomach admitting this but I love this song. I cant explain why nor would I want to if I could put it into words. Its a typical boy band song. Its as vanilla as it can get! But I know all of the words! I wouldn’t have the courage to play this in a car. So lets close all of the blinds and “Dream On Dream Away”